Hugs all around

Finally, finally, I am back home again after a longer stretch away due to the family holidays in Finland and Sweden. How it feels good - although I have not started with the mail, yet, since it is Bank Holiday Monday. The day is extraordinary, since Archaeologist Husband is away for work - the only day his boss and collaborator could make due to the elections last week. Thus, I am left to entertain Mr Wriggly, who was enthusiastically hugging us both both in the evening, when I arrived just for time for bedtime story, and now in the morning. I surely have been missed - and the bedtime story reading was longer than normally, since I have to encourage his questions for developmental support.

The developmental assessment has come through and Number One Son is significantly delayed. However, there seems to be slight differences of opinion between the professionals how significant the delay is, so we will see. As a Finn I am not totally worried, yet, since most Finns know that the developmental differences are wide until 7, although it is clear he will require help at school in England and will miss the targets for 5-year-olds. But what can you do, except trying to support a happy and confident child, who makes constant progress - although it is not swift and quick. Luckily, some of the fuss can be blamed on a certain Education Secretary who does really not know much about the different speeds of development in young childs. Nevertheless, keeping eye on progress is never to be underestimated, but the support should be automatic for all children.

The SEN rules are changing, so what the future brings is not perfectly clear. Archaeologist Husband has to arrange a meeting with the school and we will see. I hope I will be in the country on that day, since even if I have been working away, I do follow carefully the situation. Is it responsible parenting - or just parenting...

No targets in sight

This week saw Number One Son’s assessment by the paediatrician. The doctor was apparently quite happy, but I think Archaeologist Husband did not tell how much his drawing skills are behind the others. He can do a fine volcano and a dinosaur looks remotely as a real one, but any human figure is rudimentary. One of Number One’s schoolmates asked me about his mother figure, which had my one eye in the right place but the other on my chin and the figure was basically a head with a scarf downwards. At that moment I was speechless, but I probably have to start explaining to other children that with Number One Son it will take slightly longer.

Now all the offices, professionals and agencies will need our approval that they can speak to each other. Well, self-evidently they will get it, since we want that Number One Son will be monitored, even if he is probably just a late developer with a speech difficulty. In Finland this would not be a problem, but in England he will go to Class 1 in the autumn. He will probably fail all the targets for 5-year-olds that will not trouble us so much but is likely to be a bit of a headache for the school.

Thus they may hope some kind of diagnosis that would help them to explain to the Department of Education why the lateness is the case. In Finland the fact that he is a five-year old would be enough. Nothing is expected properly before seven there.

Nearer the understanding

This week brought a new assessment from Number One Son’s new speech therapist. She considers him having the speaking skills of a three-year old, but apparently understanding much more. We the parents know this, since his knowledge of dinosaurs is extraordinary and he shows signs of strategic thinking and business acumen when it comes to getting new dinosaurs.

Number One Son will soon be assessed by a paediatrician as well, so we will hear if it is likely that all this is only about speech development and lateness or if there is anything else on the background. To us he is a happy boy who shows signs of intelligence, enjoys exploring and likes his friends, so he is our delight in any case. Even if poor Archaeologist Husband gets tired while I try to keep our finances balanced and get my research somewhere.

Number One Son does Fennoscandia

Well, not ALL Fennoscandia, but only parts of two countries, i.e., Finland and Sweden. First we were travelling around southern Finland visiting my family members in different cities and then staying in my student studio flat in Stockholm. The second part involved attending an archaeological conference where Number One Son was the only visible child, although a Swedish Professor had arrived with all his family for an Easter holiday outing.

Every modern parent's dirty secret

One can never laud the persons who A) came up with the idea of a tablet computer, B) the people who came up with the idea of DOWNLOADABLE BBC iPlayer programmes, and C) the persons who developed Angry Birds in its many incarnations – including the animated movies. This setup keeps Number One Son content in the restaurants, for almost half an hour of the opening ceremony of the Nordic TAG and while waiting for mummy between the papers and the breaks in the conference. I and Archaeologist Husband wish not to think about the time these things did not exist. Even the babysitter during the day we had our session used the combined Method A and C at the end of the day.

Sweden/Finland ferry: small boy, big boat

During our trips we encountered the Nordic spring weather with all of its forms. There was the heavy rain when we landed separately at the Helsinki airport. There was snow in the woods in central Finland around my uncles houses (yes, houses – it is a long story). There was bright spring sunshine over yellow lawns in different parts of southern Finland. And there was the cold sunny weather and the warm sunny weather over very green lawns in Stockholm. The most hair-raising cum irritating moment came when on the motorway I did not know how to switch on the windscreen wipers when the rain started.

In pine forest

What I had hoped to introduced Number One Son to, was the Nordic pine forest with the grey smooth outcrops of bedrock that are marvellous to climb on. Sadly, we had all too little time for that, but he did really get the idea. Sadly, my changed schedule over the summer months will mean that we two are unlikely to spend quality time in the north as I had originally hoped for. Our precious moments of overlapping holiday are better spent at home enjoying small adventures in England.

Lambing time

I must admit that no matter how lovely the little newly born lambs are, a whole programme called Lambing Live, suggesting that there will be blood and all, makes me shiver and does not make me to want to watch it. Nevertheless, it is apparently extremely popular and as the BBC Farmers Hour told me, everything has been happier than last year, when there was snow deeply in many of the higher areas and countless lambs were lost. This year it was all sunny and happy.

The programme reminded me that Number One Son had not visited the local City Farm for ages, so we headed there on the English Mothering Day. At the same time when Archaeologist Husband was still in Reading – admittedly on his way home – in a conference networking and meeting his Roman pottery expert and Roman archaeologist friends. It was a fair day, even if it was not as sunny as the Saturday before when I and Number One Son were looking for a new proper-sized bed for him (and I fell for a cheap model, since I got a nice mattress and free home delivery, to the fury of Archaeologist Husband who had to try to put the flat pack wonder together). Number One Son and his reception classmates have ‘Animals’ as this half-term’s theme, so a picnic at the City Farm felt vaguely educational as well.

Everything was nice and lovely, but not overly exciting – until two things happened. Number One Son saw the huge pigs of a traditional British variety. Number One Son was standing next to their drinking hole, and we were lucky, since a huge pig waddled towards us in a muddy pigsty and started to drink. I must say this was very educational to me as well, since I had never seen pig’s upper lip ever. Very thin and feminine, I must say.

Even if Number One Son hogged the sandwiches and enjoyed running around in the playground, the real treat was to the last. He realised that he can feed grass to the sheep and the tickling that resulted from the sheep basically licking the grass from his hand made him giggle. That was a happy end to the fun visit.

Nothing is better than a good party!

Not unexpectedly I had to skip one blog entry, since instead of writing about it, I was spending time with Number One Son and Archaeologist Husband. I arrived on Saturday evening and headed to buy food to Number One Son’s birthday party that was going to be on the same day in the afternoon. It is not advisable to panic buy birthday food, since we ended up with more crisps than anybody can consume. In addition, many of those Aldi ones are really salty! Even if I like crisps, the red packs may stay uneaten for the future.

I am not the only one overestimating and getting carried away. Archaeologist Husband did not bake one, not two, but THREE birthday cakes. And two boxes full of fairy cakes. This meant that the cake was enough until the Mother’s Day morning. At least I got my treat even if Archaeologist Husband was in Reading in a conference.

The fact that Number One Son is behind in speech development means that he has not got too many birthday invitations lately. This is totally understandable, since most people invite about 10 or 15 best friends – or go for bowling, horse riding or other special activities. Most children has made – or at least the parents have made – the leap to the next birthday party level from the toddler parties.

The main thing was that Number One Son’s party was great and he got extra playtime with a bouncy castle during the preparation and cleaning time. One must admit that it was slightly terrifying, since the four- or five-year-old boys are quite big and strong when wrestling in a bouncy castle. However, many of them left with a glow on their face, so it was just what the doctor ordered for the boys. And the next time it is time for a ‘more mature’ party for Number One Son as well. Since his speech is improving, we will have a full account for the sixth birthday next spring.

Birthday boy with all the presents - except those from Sweden

It is a great pity that the other children and the parents did not see when Number One Son opened the presents. And how much he has been playing with them. He loves dinosaurs, so we have now more dinosaurs and dinosaur books than a small boy needs. This time around Archaeologist Husband made a list of the donors and we could actually send out thank you letters.

One child – not only one present

I have noticed alarming phenomenon. The number of presents we are buying to Number One Son is seriously escalating. I have already bought three and, although they were not hugely expensive, that will be joined by a larger amount bought by Archaeologist Husband. We know what Number One Son likes, so he will be showered with dinosaurs and cartoons. He will also get a bigger present he has specifically asked for. Nevertheless, more than anything he wants his party.

It is quite clear the exponentially growing number of small presents have to do with the fact that he is our own child. We want him to enjoy the kind of things we enjoyed when we where children and give him things he enjoys. If we had more children, we probably would not target one with all the different things. One child would get a Dalek and the other a dinosaur. Now one will get both. But now worry - we are archaeologists, so the favourable finances may be history next winter and the Christmas presents will diminish almost as exponentially as the birthday presents were increasing!

Number One Son attended today a friend’s party. He was happily waving the monkey in the banana tree balloon sculpture on Skype at bed time. Not only are balloon animals getting more complex and seriously good, but Number One Son sat down with other children following the magician for half an hour or so - and laughed at the right points. My mother was asking today over the phone how Number One Son is doing speechwise and I explained the latest developments. However, I had not heard this. I definitely has to say that there has been progress – but the progress seems to come when Number One Son is interested and wants it.